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You’re not a bad person for hoping to find a tall, wealthy man or a young, slender woman, but in the end, you’re looking for an ideal partnership, not a person with an ideal exterior.
We all like the power of being able to choose our ideal partner rather than settling for the person that happens to be available, but if you’re choosing based on superficiality, you’ll probably end up settling in the long run.
Introverts do better in one-on-one social settings than in a group, but chances are a stranger isn’t going to want to meet you one-on-one unless there are lots of other people around.
Everything in online dating is based on snap judgments, so if you strike out on a first date because you were nervous, there’s next to no chance you’ll get another at-bat.
Yet once you reveal enough information, it’s easy for someone to find your social media accounts, which might contain less flattering photos, more intimate personal information, and information about exes, family members, co-workers, bosses, and friends, all of which a random person on OKCupid has no business knowing.
When we engage in this, we don’t call it “stalking;” we call it “vetting.” We want to know as much as possible about this stranger before agreeing to meet them in person.
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The whole system is geared toward physical attraction: they show you the person’s photo before showing you anything else about the person, and you swipe left or right based on your impression of that photo, often before even reading what they have to say.